Sunday, January 24, 2016

Be my person

I know your face, I know your name
But never did I think of you much
You were always on the back of my mind
But never once did my heart nudge
A life long journey came to an end
When I packed my bags to Poland

I pull out my system to see
What my wallpaper should be?
Out of no where, I thought of you
And made you the face I first see
Then again, never did my heart nudge.

On one particular evening, there was this nudge
I began to ponder what it could be?
I saw myself talking to you
Only you couldn’t see or hear me!

A shift in the direction of wind
Changed the course of my path
When I found myself wrapped in your arms
Crying alone in the bath

For the first time I felt alone
No one to call my own
You were that one friend
Though imaginary, I wish I could clone

I was loosing my mind inside closed doors
Talking to you was my only hope
I can’t believe it happened for real
For you saved my life as I begin to slowly cope

You are a star with many friends
I am not just another fan
Whose looking to trend
I genuinely would like to ask
Will you be my person?

Wednesday, January 6, 2016

Me Against all Odds

Walking down the snow covered street
With contemplating thoughts for every heartbeat
I feel so incomplete, without the sound of your voice.

Its a battle between faith and fear
At times I can barely hear
I see the best in you, only because I choose to

For it's me against all odds
Tell me what will it cost?
For I will bring the world for you
That's the least I can do
Yes it's me against all odds
Tell me what will it cost?
To have you next me
Is all I ever need

There are moments when I throw my hands up
Run the other way and just give up
But I keep coming back, with every bit of my last hope

I try to hold it together, but
I still expect you to make me feel better
But you hardly acknowledge me, oh why can't you see?

For it's me against all odds
Tell me what will it cost?
For I will bring the world for you
That's the least I can do
Yes it's me against all odds
Tell me what will it cost?
To have you next me
Is all I ever need

Wednesday, December 2, 2015

My CHENNAI - Nandri

One cannot begin to fathom the events that are unfolding in my city
The city that birthed me, is now crying out loud!
The worst that happened to my city since I can remember is the Tsunami
But, today it’s different!
I have not seen my city come to a standstill ever,
I have not seen my city folks come together,
But, today it’s different!
As the sky opened, so did many doors,
My city has faced heavy rains before, yes it has!
But, not everyone suffered.
Not everyone reached out,
But, today it’s different!
It’s no longer friends helping friends,
It’s strangers helping strangers,
It’s no longer I can’t give you a ride,
It’s let me know if I can drop you?
It’s no longer I have to keep my gates locked,
It’s my gate is open for anyone who want to stay,
It’s no longer, hey can I have your number?
It’s this is my number, call me if you need help?
Help is on the way, in the form of prayers
From those of us away from home
In the form of food and shelter,
To the folks who need them the most
It no longer matters which class we belong to
It doesn’t matter which religion we belong to
Today, we are humans!
Today, we relate to not just a few but with all.
So, this is for all the heroes out there
To every soul who is contributing in any way possible
Nandri, Nandri, Nandri!

We anticipated rains, but nothing of this sort. To be miles away from home and trying to decipher the extent of the situation is heart breaking. I pray for each and every soul in Chennai, our city will come out strong, Vazha vaikum nadu da, Tamil Nadu, it will not be moved, our spirits will not be dampened, we may be drowning but will rise above. Stay strong Chennai, we love y'all!

Sunday, April 12, 2015

Sunanth Anand

Where do I begin? Do I pen down a poem or Do I write a memoir? I stopped writing a few years ago but a loss of a friend made me write again!
I'm at that crossroads again! Struggling to understand and unwilling to accept what has happened.
For weeks I've been fighting within myself, specially during my bus ride to work. A storm of feelings erupts within me and I try and push them away, I desperately want to talk about it but I can't, so today I decided I will say it all and get it done with!
Loss is a loss no matter how close or distant one might be. It's a loss, for when I recall the times you were there for me and it was during those times I was down and out. The last time I reached out to you was during such a similar time and I had no idea.
There is just so much to say and every bit of it is very difficult to write down as I realise I am left only with these memories. I don't believe friends are best friends when they are connected to each other everyday, friends are friends the minute one person has an impact on the other, you were that one person in my life.
I would normally chose my words carefully, to make it effective and eloquent for the readers, but today, I care not. This is not for the readers, this is my way to keep you alive within me and amongst some of our mutual friends.
It all began when you were still in school, a young boy. My initial thoughts were, " Dark & Dusky"; Sweet & Bubbly" and ain't he naughty. A personal sense of joy that "we" dark people are super cool.
Every time, I have seen you, it was at Mayo's and that's because I was always at Janan's! So basically, we were at the same house almost every other day. What are the odds!
Mayo had the best of friends ( touch wood) and for someone like me who had to travel 38 KM to college to be among friends, to coming back home to no friends, it was an absolute pleasure to have you and the boys over at Mayo's and rarely at mine.
I, so very clearly recall telling Janan and she agreeing with me, that we were two old people basking in the friendship of our brothers cause we were without friends our own age! Aren't we a bore?
Remember your exam days? I was taking classes for Mayo,Sathya and Tintu, and just when I got them to listen to me, you barged it with a plate of food from the kitchen and distracted every one of them. The only pics I could get hold of are the below. PRICELESS

You kept my life as colourful as you kept theirs and you weren't there only for these naughty-silly moments. You were there during most of my trying times. I was just out of college and secured a job, sadly I met with an accident and fractured my leg. My only visitors were you and Mayo, every evening you would make a pit-stop to take jabs at me and my broken leg ( all in good spirit). I used to wonder why you guys would even bother to come and pay me a visit, but never really cared to know why because you would make me laugh so much that I forget I was couch ridden. I had no friends during those days, my college life was over and my work life didn't even begin, so the fact that you showed up with Mayo, made my MOM so happy. Fatso- you even sat on my broken leg! What were you thinking!!

A year went by and once again my dark life continued. My sisters were trying their best to make me feel better and when nothing worked, it was Mayo and Suna to the rescue. A quick get away was planned, my first ever outing with family and friends. We had whale of a time, with all the games/music and food. How can I forget the perfect entry for the song "Masakali" and Janan screaming in the background "Dance Sunanth". You would give that shy smile like you you know nothing. 

Y'all dozed off so early but gave us ample time to click away pictures of you boys sleeping like angels. How glad am I to have that shot of you Suna. It truly was that moment where I realised how naughty you really were and you proved it too, when we girls specifically told you boys to not occupy the pool until we were done with it. But, you got you fat ass down there even before we did. Ass! Manasula, Billa nu nanaipu. But yes, smart you were and we got that shot too.

A year or so later, we met again. I Had planned for a movie with my so called boy friend and you guys. A day I truly forgot, but is now etched in my heart forever, not because of him but because of you. That jerk of a guy, dropped me in the middle of the road late at night and drove away, only for you guys to find me and I will now never forget the shelling I had from you. I was completely traumatized and heart-broken about what had happened and you took  me away (to the beach), put your arm around me and told me "its not worth it". I am 5 years elder to you and the level of maturity and the amount of care and affection you and Mayo had on me, I can never stop being amazed and how wonderful you guys are.
A year or two passed by, we would meet and greet every time we bump into each other, how work life changes people ( at least me). Then, one day, my cousins were down and we girls had no one who could take us out somewhere. So we began to bug/beg you. Off we went for a night ride, first to the pan shop in Nungambakkam and then to the only place that was open at that time of night, Chit-Chat.
I was hungry as hell and when I am, I don't share food. So, I very clearly asked you if you wanted anything to eat and you said, I am fine with just a drink (water). I believed you da Gunda! But you got your hands on my food anyway. Grrrr!
Naturally, when girls get together they would click away and you didn't even stand still for one picture, Ironically, most of us were dressed in blue and I wanted a shot of us in blue, you just wouldn't stand still, the pic I got of us was this. Notice, how I am trying to hold you back, with my finger!

I always say, it's never a good bye, it's always until we meet again. Those were my words to you before you left for the US. All of us got busy lives and I clearly wasn't hanging around much with Mayo's friends and so we hardly spoke after you landed there. But, you remembered and messaged me, I would return your messages and life continued. The one time you messaged and I didn't reply for about a month and when I did and had that chat, I had no idea it was our last!

Suna, Of the things I have said above, I realise that I never got to Thank You da. You were so special to me because of all the quirky and sweet things you have said and done for me. I never said Thank you. It kills me to write all of this, But, this is it, isn't it? I will never forget you and I will always keep you alive in my memory. 

I miss you Suna and I don't think you can be replaced! Look down upon us will you, when we look up to you.

Sunday, October 14, 2012


Who would have thought?
That I'd be hooked upon you
So, I ask for you number
Hoping you'd ask for mine too

I would sit in a bar
Happily waiting for you
Would smile all the way
As I see you come through

I search in my soul
For the reason I love you
I think it’s just madness
To do what I do

I had you in my arms
And all I could do was
Stare in your eyes
Cause you’re damn beautiful

It would take me forever
To just let you know
That I’d follow your footsteps
Where ever you go

But, if there comes a day
When you leave me again
I’d stay right where you left me
Through the storm and the rain

Monday, February 6, 2012

Hands that Smiled

I was in school, I used to see him
He would hold out his hands and ask me
I wouldn't have no penny to give him
I'd swear so he would beleive me

I didn't know he was poor
Little did I know he was suffering
When people like me had houses to live in
I use to wonder where he'd be living

Years passed by and he was still there
I could see that he's been trying
To get a life, so he wouldn't dare
To lose the one that he's having

I walked up to him and gently smiled
He said " it's pretty, don't lose it"
Even today when I think of him
His presence I can feel it

When someone so poor loves himself
Why on earth are people dying?
Learn to live through the troubles instead
You will come out of it, still flying.

Saturday, February 4, 2012

Tell Me....

Tell me how it feels
To know that I am crazy about you
Tell me how it feels
To know that this love is true

I will do anything to have you next to me
You are my life, my future is with thee
I forever will be by your side
Through your good and your trying times

My sunshine you are
So near yet so far
This fight I no longer need
It's your love that I wish to feel

Simple words are what holds the truth
Let it dwell and it will bear fruits
Take me by your hand
Take me with thee
Let me be there for you
Say, you belong to me